An Honest Post
I wrote this in a weekly newsletter after my wedding, I wanted to share this with all the new members to hopefully hep you see all of us have those days and times where its not easy. I cant say I stuck to upping my calories and to be honest ive learnt to relax a little more with food, I’m still learning but ive got fitness goals at the moment and I’m learning to be happy with a more manageable healthier weight.. I am however happy with small victories each week so the money jar is up to £100!
Here you go…
Ok so lets go back to only what...just over three weeks ago! So it was a week before the wedding, I had a massive goal (to fit into the dress) and I was 100% committed and working my butt off! This final week I lowered my calories very low for me (1200-1500), I drank tons of water, did weighs 6 x per week and 20 minutes of cardio a day! I was in automatic with my foot well and truly off the break! I was also working still and doing the last minute wedding stuff!
So the big day came (best day EVER) and I loved every second...it truly was magical, but im sure ive banged on about this enough already! Anyway from this day I haven't stopped eating!
I have found the time to train say 3-4 x per week but not nearly as hard as should have been to outbalance to 5-6k pretty much daily calories...no S**T!
I just cant stop, well I have had to now because it was out of control. Every day has been a total binge, like not even enjoying the food I'm eating, and eating so much I feel sick ( Note:I WAS NOT SICK! This isn't an eating disorder, this is simply me being silly leaving the dress diet to the last minute and not giving myself enough time so dieting on too little, reaching my goal then being a REBEL because I restricted too much!)
NOT THE WAY IT SHOULD BE DONE!
I'm not sure what admitting this will do for my street cred (if I ever had any) but I'm just being honest. As a PT id love to say I eat all my greens everyday, that I would choose an avocado over a Mc Donald's, i’m consistent and always prepared but its just not true. I love food, all food, I love training and my downfall is that I binge. It doesn't even concern me from a weight/ fat level point of view, because I normally sort my S##t out within a week (after having every type of takeaway, sweet treat, cereal and even the kids YoYo's!) Yes it can effect fat levels and weight but even a massive week binge could be corrected in a few weeks, so thats not my main concern!
What I really struggle with is how it effects my health, how it makes my guts feel, and mentally the lack of control freaks me out too! I find it hard to find that balance when not macro tracking, which to be honest is a bit sad I think, but im working on it...in life I don't believe we ever stop learning, I don't know everything and im certainly not perfect, but its through our experiences that I think we are able to help others.
I deal with lots of different eating habits as a PT, people don't eat, eat a little too much every day, don't know the calorific values of food, binge, binge then starve, exercise too much, exercise too little! But there is always a way to deal with it, we just have to find the right way that works for you.
Its not always easy to identify where your going wrong and its taken me a while to step out of my little head and realise where I'm at and how I need to move forward, but what works for me might not be for you.
I plan to overcome the binges by slowly increasing my calories on a weekly basis, I have even printed a calender and planned this (as I would a client) so I can see more food is coming. I am also allowing one day off a week and as long as I don't binge I put some money in a jar and at the end of the month I will reward myself with a facial or something nice which isn't food, (with summer holidays booked we are pulling in the purse strings.)
So if you need help, whatever the issue (even if your not sure what the issue is) then get in touch with me, I can help!
Yes ive got the wedding blues a little but I'm also really happy to have some time for me and the kids and dean, and ive eaten a lot of nice food and drank some nice wine since so I’m also as happy as a pig in muck right now!
Maricarmen x